Equation of LOVE

Love is the purest feeling that exists in the world; something that has the ability to heal and cure; has the power to give life; has the ability to empower and nourish. For most of us love is about a deep connect with someone on a physical and mental level. On a practical thought, doesn't love give us pain on separation with a loved person or thing? Also, the phrase 'love hurts' has been used vulgarly without understanding the fact that love is beautiful.

Love is a feeling meant to give us warmth, positivism and pleasure but according to 'love hurts' love also gives us agony, restlessness and discomfort. Hence, we cannot say that real love is the one that hurts.

Our default thinking of love is:

LOVE = PLEASURE + PAIN

Now, how we derive pleasure differs from person to person. Pleasure is nothing permanent but temporary which will make the feeling of love also temporary. On, a deeper level, pleasure can be defined as:

PLEASURE = VANITY + ARROGANCE + CRITICISM + BOASTING + JUNK FOOD + SEX + SADISM

Also, pain is derived in the process of love which may be due to numerous components causing it such as:

PAIN = FEAR + IMPATIENCE + ATTACHMENT + EXPECTATIONS 

Therefore on combining equations of pleasure and pain we get;

LOVE = VANITY + ARROGANCE + CRITICISM + BOASTING + JUNK FOOD + SEX + SADISM + FEAR + IMPATIENCE + ATTACHMENT + EXPECTATIONS 

Vanity is nothing but loving your achievements or looks and enhancing them with grooming, make up etc to look better as per someone else's standards and constantly rotating in this quest. This feeling simply provokes us to continually be in competence with others; loosing our peace for something which is not permanent as one's body changes each moment. Exaggerated sense of self importance i.e. arrogance is vanity's brother which makes you belittle others. This makes them hold grudges against you and change their attitude towards you forever. Thereafter, the same is brought to us and we don't like it. Also, singing about your achievements, your looks, your possessions or property is nothing but boasting which really doesn't help in the long run. Some people have a habit of going on singing their 'so called victory tales' which interests no one!

Further, we love finding faults in others which begets the negative energy to us. Also, criticism has never ever won us anything. We must think from the alternate aspect i.e. opposite of criticism  which is appreciation and appreciate people and things around us. For instance, a spot like a pimple on your face spoils its perfection but if you continually think about it instead of ignoring it; you might end up scratching it and worsening the situation.

Loading oneself with junk is inviting excess fat and then later cribbing about the same is certainly something that can be avoided by switching to the right foods. Excess sugar puts strain on the digestive system and how long can one take that? Hence, diseases. 

Sex is a physical need and gives temporary pleasure. It is one exercise that pulls us to repeat its performance and crave for more. It could be seen as a controllable desire but not love. Fear makes you crib, live in the past,  develop over-eating habits, stress and even depression. Using fear as a motivation is a terrible tool for a good life.

Impatience, the mother of resistance makes us nervous and effects our body adversely by secreting hormones which are not good in excess for our body in the long run. It makes us loose energy without a purpose.

We attach to people and things thinking that they will remain with us if we care, cherish or nurture them always. But, when we lose the loved ones or things we call our own like our watch, house, gold or anything we feel emotions beyond our control. Thus, endearment gives us pain instead of love.

As far as expectations are concerned; everyone expects, whether its a parent expecting a child to perform well and grow up to take care of them; an investor expecting the investment to give unrealistic returns. We expect love in turn for love we give to others and when they don't revert; we feel bad, ignored or even resentful. Love isn't actually about give and take.